This Week In Despair With Peter-john Byrnes

My sister Jessica Byrnes makes a return appearance, accompanied by local man-about-town Brian Wille. The VP debate is quickly discussed and dismissed in favor of Lance Armstrong's testicle, a murder-castration in New York, and the linking of Laura Ingalls Wilder and Flowers in the Attic. Jessica won't stop talking about Danish penises. Mice are disparaged. Iowa is praised.