Failure To Launch

This week we examine Blood Ties, a 1991 attempt to bring the “vampires live among us, and they’re SEXY” genre to life over a decade before HBO did it with True Blood. The problem, however, was that this was a network show. So where HBO added sex appeal into True Blood with Tons o’ Nudity and Sex™, Blood Ties had to settle for sexy innuendos. When it turned out they couldn’t write sexy innuendos (there’s a twinkie metaphor that isn’t the obvious one), they tried adding incest to spice things up, which is akin to spicing up a curry with a small chemical fire. Also, one of the vampires was named Corey Puckett. Even without the incest, this was the level of sexiness we were working with.   Reviewers: James Ferris, Harry Brimage, Alex Malone Soundboard: David Shaw