Dr. Ross Greene

Happy New Year!  Thanks to a caller, we were able to visit many important aspects of the CPS Model by hearing about an early attempt at Plan B with her 15 year old son.

Amazing discussions with our two callers today, both parents whose kids are struggling with school. We covered many of the nuances of solving problems collaboratively, but it all starts with making sure you're clear on what's making it hard for a kid to meet a particular expectation.  

There's always some detective work to be done when Plan B doesn't go as well as hoped. Our team responded to some inquiries about that on today's podcast, but -- as is often to case with Plan B -- the team needed more info to be maximally helpful. The team was in rare form today...  

Thanks to a caller, we got a wonderful gift by helping to restore her hope, perspective, and energy for Plan B!  Lots of good info about how to go from Plan C to Plan B, plus ALSUP and drilling tips.

On our last program before the Summer break, we talked with two callers about what to do when solutions aren't truly mutually satisfactory.

We covered a few emails on today's program, including one from a parent that sparked a great conversation about whether Plan B is a way to get the adult's expectation met - the answer is "possibly" - listen for details!  Also, trouble shooting screen time-related Plan B.

An abbreviated (30 minutes) program today, but lots of territory covered...including how to apply Plan B to disrespectful behaviors. (Hint: you won't be working on the disrespect directly.)

You can't solve everything at once, so you'll have to be selective in choosing problems to start solving first. The algorithm: safety, frequency, and gravity. Thanks to a mom who called in, you'll get a real-life example on this program.  

The standard advice is defuse, de-escalate, and keep everyone safe. But Collaborative & Proactive Solutions goes further than that. It's crucial to identify and solve the problem that caused the child to become physically aggressive in the first place. Once the problem is solved, the child won't become physically aggressive in response to it anymore. And if you're only defusing, de-escalating, and keeping everyone safe, the problem won't get solved.

Lots of helpful topics covered today including adjusting the model for kids with language difficulties, drilling for information, wording unsolved problems, and more!

If only solving problems collaboratively was really easy! Well, sometimes it is, but sometimes some fairly common roadblocks can get in the way, and on today's program we talked about a bunch of 'em, thanks to our callers and emailers.

Well, aside from providing guidance to a few parents on diffiuclties they're experiencing with their children, we also heard from a parent who feels strongly that government shouldn't tell parents how to parent. While we didn't agree completely, it gave us a good opportunity to listen, something that seems in short supply these days...

On our first program of the fall, we heard from a mom who's having trouble engaging her son in Plan B...and having trouble keeping her energy up to stick with the process. Hopefully the guidance of our panel was helpful.

Does behavior belong in step 2?  How do you find your "window in" with a reluctant older teen?  Dealing with guilt over giving in...all these topics and more were covered on today's episode.

But probably not the "f" word you're thinking of. And, when it comes to wording unsolved problems well, even "f" words are relevant.

Two callers provided lots of great conversation today - everything from sibling strife, can an adult's concern be "I feel disrespected," and how to revisit a solution that isn't working.

Findings from the Lives in the Balance survey on Parenting During the Pandemic are now available on the Lives in the Balance website, and were discussed at the beginning of the program. Then we heard from a mom whose first attempt at Plan B went a lot better than she realized.

Thanks to four parents who emailed us with questions, this podcast provides a great overview of the basic components of identifying and solving problems collaboratively and proactively. Nothing beats real life...

After helping a mom sort through the ins and outs of doing Plan B with her son, we turned our attention to email, including one from a mom who was concerned that doing Plan B meant she was always going to be accomodating her son's problems. Good to get that cleared up.

On today's program, we responded to a mom whose son was having difficulty participating in the Define Adult Concerns step and Invitation step of Plan B, prompting some hopefully helpful words of wisdom from our panel. Also covered: should consuquences be used in tandem with Plan B...and should parents explain Plan B to kids before doing it?