Dr. Ross Greene

On today's program, Dr. Greene heard about the efforts of a mom who was struggling to do Plan B with her son...and gave some (hopefully) helpful tips on how to fine-tune the effort (including some of the things mom was thinking that were getting in the way).

Are bullies lacking skills? How about the bullied? If so, then what do they really need from us? The Parents Panel weighs in!

On this program, Dr. Greene answered questions from emailers and covered a wide range of topics...including what to do when religious values and Plan B seem inconsistent with each other.

On today's program, we heard from two different parents who were having difficulty making sure their children were well-understood and well-treated at school. Our key theme: nothing takes the place of identifying a kid's lagging skills and unsolved problems prior to making placement decisions.

In this first program of the new school year, Dr. Greene responded to some of the email he received over the summer. Some familiar themes: the necessity of creating a (very specific) list of unsolved problems, prioritizing (so you know what problems you're working on right now and the ones you're not), and, most importantly, solving problems collaboratively and proactively.  It's very hard...but when parents do those things, over time, they get their energy back.

Is the CPS model compatible with Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA)?  That depends on your definition of ABA. Is intervention "working"?  That depends on your definition of "working". 

Some behaviorally challenging kids don't like to be suprised by the topic and timing of Plan B, even when it's proactive. Better to make an appointment with the child...and even give the child the heads-up on the topic.

Parenting and teaching kids with behavioral challenges is really hard.  But there are things adults can do to make it even harder, and things adults can do to make it easier (not easy, easier).

Lots of callers on today's program, and we covered lots of key themes of Collaborative Problem Solving. One of the most important: when you're solving problems, you're not primarily trying to figure out what a child should do once he or she becomes upset...but rather solutions that will durably solve the problems that are causing the child to become upset in the first place.

On today's program, the Parents Panel heard from a mom who's son's academic difficulties had become problematic again recently...did he lose his motivation or did the academic tasks begin exceeding his capacity to respond adaptively?  That's what the Empathy step is for.

If a child's behavioral challenges are the result of poor motivation, then rewarding and punishing makes perfect sense.  But if it's lagging skills...and if the behavioral challenges occur in response to specific unsolved problems...well, you have some problem-solving in your future...hopefully, the collaborative kind.

A mom called in for help on gathering information in the Empathy step of Plan B.  And our emailers provided additional grist for the discussion mill:  How do you tell the world about your challenging child?  What if the adult is lacking some important skills, too?

The title of this program tells you about an issue raised by one of our callers.  But lots of additional issues were covered as well, including what to do if one parents is on board with CPS and the other isn't (yet).

Susie, a member of our Parents Panel, raised the topic of paddling kids at school, and the discussion took off from there...with some fairly predictable conclusions.

There are lots of things that could be slowing things down when families are implementing the CPS model...but it's good to remember that getting good at Plan B and making fundamental changes in family interactions doesn't happen in a week anyway. 

A variety of topics on today's program, thanks to our emailers, but what to do if the first solution doesn't work? That came from our caller.

That's the topic we led off with, but we moved on to other interesting discussions, thanks to our callers.

Sometimes grandparents have strong opinions about the manner in which challenging kids should be disciplined, and aren't so familiar with Plan B. What to do? The Parents Panel weighs in (on this and other topics).

On today's program, Dr. Greene responded to the email that has gathered over the past month or so. A variety of topics were discussed, including the need to identify specific unsolved problems, whether the CPS model is applicable to "imploders" as well as "exploders," how to word a neutral observation in the Empathy step, and the fact that vague concerns tend to lead to vague solutions. Very informative!

Lots of callers on today's program, and lots of good information, too.